Forum Posts

steph.bachmair
Apr 08, 2022
In Main Discussion Channel
Struggling with another light c-infection, made me step back from many duties last days, but nothing could stop me to step into the writing challenge …. Love it !!
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steph.bachmair
Apr 02, 2022
In Main Discussion Channel
if someone, plans also to work with co-creative session or is curious about my content, please contact me personally steph@b-onfire.com the sessions will be in English with people from all different places, here is the invite to check on dates and times (CET)
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steph.bachmair
Apr 02, 2022
In Main Discussion Channel
All white today. The world looks like sleeping in peace. It seems a lie to me, but I can not resist, I lean in … in the calm of this moment. So much snow. In April?! It is like nature is taking another breath, giving space to something …. and I step in, take some of it and breathe. Walking step by step on all this whiteness, I listen to Marlene Dietrich’s song ‚Where have all the Flowers gone‘ and tears run over my cheeks (second time today). Where have they gone? This song is out of a different time, speaks about soldiers going into war … a different war. A war that I only got to know through telling and reading. The song seems like a message from the past, I know that my grandmother was hearing this song when she was young - many years ago. This morning in a virtual meeting, I heard Anna - a Russian woman - singing it. We met - 12 women from all over the globe -working on outer war and inner war/peace. It was touching to hear this old familiar (German) song in Russian language and it created a deep peaceful connection between us - a short quantum flirt, a glimpse into a different world. Anna had spoken before about her fear to get mad. She explained, how her surounding was supporting Putin in his dictatorship, believing in the official stories and/or not wanting to see a different truth. In her ‚resistance‘ , she and her family were not only marginalized, but in concrete real danger. She wondered how her life could ever get back into normal again. Listening and feeling her, made run tears over my cheeks sitting in front of the vividly filled zoom screen. I saw so much beauty in her desperation, so much strength in her vulnaribility …. and said to her : "Please do not get back into normal, it needs some of your madness to create a NEW normal, a different world. Please please don't give up!" I am not Russian, but I strongly related to her pain. I started to scan in my memories where this came from. What in Anna was relating to my stories? Sure, there is the memory of dictatorship still woven in the German collective. But there is still more, there were times in my past, I was overpowered by someone’s story and stepping out of the ‚gaslighted’ reality was a tough process. I doubted my truth and feared to get mad. Slightly altered by the release of pain of this deep and old wound, I did not access what happened cognitively in this moment, but the image of a snowdrop came into my mind .... and how this tender flower is making its way through the cold. And yes, I mean thats me … it is part of my DNA, the snowdrop's fight for Light/Truth/spring. It started with my birth, but that is a different story. Let me share a snowdrop pantoun to explore this further: Fight for Light I am a snowdrop I am ready to appear I am a pioneer I trust beyond I am a snowdrop I will blossom I am a pioneer I am strong I am ready to appear I know it is time to cut through the snow I trust beyond I will see the sun I will blossom I will inspire I will die I will be in peace I know it is time to cut through I woke up I see the sun and I will sleep again Last year someone listening to a story I told, said to me: “You are ‚a rebel‘.“ I asked him: “How do you know?“ He said: “You would rather leave all comfort behind than compromising on your (deep) Truth. yes, he was right. somehow. And still there are these moments, where I lean in the peaceful white snow landscape and instead of fighting for life, I die and I merge into the silence … at least for a little moment. what is about you? Do you know this too?
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